A reflection by Regina Walton, Editor and Content Developer for Discipleship Initiatives.
When I was the pastor of a congregation greeting first-time visitors to Sunday worship, I would often commend them for their bravery. “It’s a daunting thing to show up at a new church for the first time—but you did it!”
Even with so much information available on the internet or social media, it still takes significant courage to walk through the doors of a new church for the first time. You find a spot in what you hope is not someone else’s favorite pew going back three generations; you scan the bulletin to see if you know the tune to at least some of the hymns; you try to join in at the right time in the prayers. Everything is unfamiliar.
And that’s just during the service! Navigating small talk before and after worship (without spilling powdered donut crumbs on your shirt during Coffee Hour) can feel like an obstacle course. If you’re visiting with children of any age, a frail elder, or someone with disabilities (or if you yourself have disabilities), or if your race, age, sexual orientation or gender expression puts you in the minority of those gathered, the complexities multiply.
Visiting a new church is truly an act of faith. Those of us receiving these brave souls as they step through the church doors for the first time need to keep this in mind.
Offering a robust, Christ-like welcome means making room for others to join in. We should offer a welcome that is sincere but not overbearing. We should show interest in visitors, without making them feel like they are at a speed-dating event. And, what is often the hardest thing of all: we need to take a break from talking to our friends, in order to talk to newcomers.
Greeting visitors can feel awkward for some of us. Here are a few tips that can help:
- When you introduce yourself, name some of the ministries you are involved in. This gives a sense of what’s going on at church, and may spark more conversation.
- Offer to show the visitor around the church. Demystify the space so visitors feel more comfortable.
- Introduce visitors to others at church. Find folks who share interests they have named, or just connect them with a few friendly faces.
- Follow visitors’ cues with sensitivity. Don’t drag them to Coffee Hour against their will, or strong-arm them into filling out a Newcomer card if they seem hesitant. Visitors may prefer to keep young children with them on a first visit; don’t make them feel like all babies must be deposited in the Nursery.
People who have made the choice to boldly go to church where they have not gone before are usually doing so because their longings outweigh their anxieties: they long for a deeper relationship with God. They long to connect with others seeking the same thing. They long for opportunities to serve others in Christ’s name, and to make a difference in a hurting world. The Holy Spirit is already powerfully at work in the life of every person who steps through those church doors. Let them know that their presence is a blessing!
